So tragic

A lot of soldiers from the 10th mountain/3rd Brigade combat team have been returning to Fort Drum the past few weeks. Just today 200 soldiers returned...which is always nice to see. But then today we hear on the news that some of the soldiers that came back today will be going right back to Afghanistan within the next few days and that their tour has been extended another4 months! Them and a lot of the soldiers that thought they were days from American soil will all be extended. 3500 total.

It's a damn shame. To me it's one thing to be sitting over in Afghanistan and get your heart broken when you learn you won't be coming home as soon as you thought...cause it's sad...but it happens alot. Andrews first tour in Iraq was extended and he ended up being out there for 14 months instead of 12. It sucked, but I think I would rather have it that way, then to have gone to a re-deployment ceremony and been so happy to have him home again....those ceremonies are wild..you can't imagine. Dads seeing their babies for the first time, every one is so emotional, including all the kids who missed their mother/father so much. And then to learn later that night, after you thought you were home for a while, that your going to be on the next plane back? Oh man. That's enough to throw in the towel and take the consequences if you ask me! It's got to be so hard on them...I truly sympathize.

Andrew isn't in the 3 rd Brigade, so hopefully it doesn't happen to him. I will be crossing my fingers. I know he would be pretty tore up if it did get extended till June. Not too mention me. I've been falling for months now..it's the last thing I want to hear. So here's to the 277th Aviation Support Battalion making it home as scheduled! Positive thoughts people....positive thoughts...

And sorry if I sounded like I was having a pity party in my last entry about thinking I was boring. Maybe the word is dull? I dunno. I can be interesting....if your the kind of person who likes to take some time to get to know someone. I just don't wear it all on my sleeve, so I think sometimes that works against me?

WACK

I'm crazy ya'll - totally losing it. It's almost 5 am and I haven't had a wink of sleep. I tried to go to sleep around 1 am but it wasn't happening, I laid in my bed for I don't know how damn long...like till 2:30 or something. F*cking lame man. LAME.

I got up and painted a little..god knows if it will be worth anything though. Now I'm just sitting here jamming to Stone Sour on my headphones. I have been obsessed with them since last week when I first heard them. They are a lot harder than the music I usually listen too, but it's been hitting the spot like you wouldn't believe..almost as sweet as sex. Maybe I say this because I've forgotten what sex is like? Quit laughing at me...dammit I have issues. hehe.

Back to Stone Sour hitting my sweet spot...

They got some wicked beats...all hardcore. I listen to them and all my pent up angst comes to the surface ready to play with some poor unfortunate soul that crosses my path. I'm not even kidding...GRRRRR...be afraid. {{{very afraid}}}

Unfortunately no one crosses my freakin path. What fun is that??

Gah. Anyway, pretty soon I am going to upload a few tracks to my media player and put it back in my sidebar - then you too will be able to bring out your inner angst to play... and together we will make this world an angrier place! Capeesh? You know you want too. Don't lie.

Back to my sleeping issue...

I've been like this a lot lately. My body wants to do this whole 24 hours up and 8 hours down thing..and I can't seem to manually correct it. I got up early today, thinking maybe by this evening I would have been tired, but no dice. It sucks because by about 5-6 pm tonight, my body/mind will be ready to collapse in on itself. Then I will get a good nights sleep, and then the next night be up all night again. It's a horrible pattern. I'm thinking I need to get some sleep aid or something. Tylenol PM? Gotta write that one down...


I bet I'm not making any sense as I write this either. It probably sounds all wiggity wiggity wiggity wack...

My poor brain cells need some rest. They are dwindling and losing the war of my stupidity.


So yah. Ending this for now. I will surely regret it in the morning.

Oh wait. It IS the morning. Righhhhht. $%@&*!^@%

LAME.

The Response

Some people just don't get the point. The last thing I thought I said was that I was TRYING with what I could for now. Dyslexia you think?? Cause she thinks I said I wanted a good-bye from her. Ummm. ok.

Here is what she posted in her blog. Good luck on understanding it.

"I guess you want a goodbye......
I tried and that is all I can do and what you have its ok with me .. I am not going to beg for any thing from you i just wanted to start someting . But i see that is not what you wanted.. That is your lose I am a good person and yes we all have our fault you do too and everyone does so just do whatyou feel what you think is best for you . I will always have love in my heart for you but if you dont want it thats ok.. You have to deal with that in your own way.. I never said that i was perfect and yes i did have to put you in the children home and talked to you about that .. Your dad was drunk and didnt want to deal with any of this and when he got that way he beat me and that is some that no child needs to see he was in fault as well so keep that in mind an d may GOD be with you in this.... I am not going to let this end my life I do have other children that do love me and grand children too and i am great person once someone gives a chance to someone... So say what ever you want to say about me because i dided it and you didnt so you dont know the whole truth. You are getting one side of it and that is fine if that is what you want i am not going to make you hear me if you dont want to .. And to let go for what happen to me and the things i went thur there will never be any chance for HIM to get in this life and what he did God what is due to him... So hate me is that is what you want to do .. But you can never take what is in my heat for you so .. THis is the end until you decide what you want to do with me and if that is nothing so be it .. I will leave you alone and hope you have a wonderful life and take care of your children and just live each day and smell the roses and take care ...
MY love is there if you ever want it... so i guess this is the end and have a good life and I am sorry that your life was such a Fuck up but you arent the only on on this earth that has been thur shit ... This is the end of this and i wont let you commment on this you know my email address if you have some thinkg to say let me knot there is shouldnt be on the the blpog for everyone but if that is what you want to make me look so bad ok and i am just going to let you know what all you think you know just remember there are aallways tow sides to a story.. good luck in life and my God be with you"

WELL.

If that doesn't make you feel proud of where you come from then I don't know what will!!!

jeeze louise, somebody get me a drink.