Wednesday, July 12, 2006


Over the past few days I got some news that's been a little unsettling. My mom died. I guess I'm still trying to process it, I have a lot of mixed feelings on the subject, and questions I would like to ask, but I'm not sure I really want the answers..etc..Etc..

During the day I'm fine, it's when I try to close my eyes at night that it stings. But whatever, I'll work through it.

At 29 both of my parents are dead. Who would have thought. In my head I just keep thinking..phase two...phase two...phase two..just move on..get on with it. Andrew says that's cold hearted. I think it's a survival instinct. All my life that's what I've done. I hit a bump..a burns, it hurts, the pain is unavoidable, but none of that pain makes any of it go away, it fixes nothing. So I move on. Put it on the back burner, what else is there to do? Maybe it's not the normal way of handling things, but it's my way, and it hasn't failed me before.

So anyway, I don't really feel like talking more about Niagara Falls, but I still have a lot of nice pictures, so I think I'm going to open up a photo album of some sort where people can look at the pics if they want too. This weekend we went to Alexandria Bay and I got even more pictures that rock..and with all the cool places to go around here , getting good pics will probably be a trend, so starting an album seems like the thing to do.

Oh yeah..and yesterday was Audrey's Birthday. She's 3! We took her to Apple Bee's and had them come clapping and singing to her...she loves to watch when they do it for other people, she even claps with them. When they came up to her with her cake, and should have seen the magic in her eyes. The girl was on cloud nine.

Also, at about 6pm last night I got cable. Yay! It's fancy cable too, I love it. I got a DVR cable box, and I can pause live programming..record a show with a push of a button and watch it later..oh's nice. Last night I would have missed Big Brother because we were out to dinner...but was recording it for me..that and Rockstar Supernova. So finally at about midnight I sat down to watch them...and got to fast forward through the commercials. Hell yeah. It also has HBO on demand, so all the episodes I've been missing of Deadwood I can catch up on. You know I'm stoked.

And of course nothing beats having my highspeed internet again. Nope. Nothing.


Sarah said...

Glenda, I'm so sorry to hear about your mom. I know what it's like to lose a parent, but I also understand the mixed feelings you are having about it. If you need to talk, I'm hear for you. I think your way of thinking about it is good for you right now. It took me over 6 months to mourn the death of my dad. But then again, I only had fond memories of him... At first, I was numb and sometimes that's the way it has to be to get through the day.

On another note: Happy Birthday to Audrey! They are still fun when they are three... it's when they hit 4 that the trouble starts. Enjoy this last year of sanity!

Ooooh yay! High speed internet is always good. I haven't had good internet for a year now... Can't wait till I move.

Hang in there sweetie. I will keep you in my prayers and I'm always here for you if you want to talk. *hug*

Anonymous said...

Hey sis, sorry to hear about your loss. I just want to drop you a line and let you kow that I am here for you if need to talk or anything. I will try to send that email tomorrow that I promised about a month ago!! Hope all is alright other than this and hope to hear from you soon!! Love, Damon

Glenda said...

thanks guys

Dwain said...

Your way of dealing with pain in your life may not work for others but if it works for you, that is the point. As long as you don't go crazy do it. I really think we all need someone to talk to about our intermost feelings. Someone we can trust so they don't come up and bite us in the you know what.
I am here for you should you find a need big sister. Love you.

Josh said...

Sorry about your mother. I tend to put bad things away so I don't have to deal with it and then I pull it back out months or years later. Whatever gets you through it.